The Locket in Utah (a post five months late)

I was very excited to get the locket. My February mamas hold a special place in my heart. They supported me through the "normal" pregnancy stuff, but became my rocks when I lost my babies at 26 weeks. They were the first people I told (after my husband) when I found out I was pregnant with my sweet Owen. Their excitement calmed my anxieties and allowed me to enjoy my pregnancy more than I thought possible. They also lent valuable experience and advice as I approached Owen's birth and in the days/weeks/months following. They've been there for me through everything. 

We had a special set of circumstances leading up to Owen's birth. Owen had a high probability of having retinoblastoma, so we looked into the possibility of having him a few weeks early. When we decided to have Owen at 37 weeks, the mamas bent over backwards to make sure I'd have the necklace in time. When we found that Owen's lungs weren't ready, they insisted I keep the necklace for a few more weeks so I could have it when he was born.

The locket saw me through Owen's birth and the first few weeks of his life. It was a tangible way for me to have all of my February mamas by my side. I didn't realize before I experienced pregnancy, the loss of my twins, and the birth of Owen how important it is to have a network of supportive friends. I believe strongly that it was divine intervention that led me to the February mamas. Now that I'm a mother to a (living) child, I need them more than ever. I hope the locket brings this sense of love and support to the other mamas as it makes its way around.

And the Bugs Keep Coming!

I was so excited to get the Love Bug Necklace after our newest baby to the group, O., had it. I asked Kimberly to please take a picture of him wearing it so it would be like I got hugs from both of them.

When I got the necklace, I took a photo of my newest baby, who is only 5 weeks old, with it. I got to thinking about all the new babies the group has had the pleasure of adding into our Feb family and how full the necklace would be if we kept filling it with birthstones. We always joke that our group will be perma-pregnant from now on and it's exciting to see our Feb family growing.

Since the last "Feb" baby was born in March 2012, we've added five new "bugs" (including my newest son) who span the months of March, April, and May of 2013. This would add two more birthstones into the tiny locket, diamonds and emeralds. There are plenty more moms who are expecting even more little bugs in the upcoming year. I'm sure we will hit all twelve months soon and while it would be fun, it would also be impractical to keep stuffing our tiny locket with more gemstones.
As I looked at the locket with my first "Feb" baby, I realized it was bursting already with charms representing our babies and the love we share for them and one another.

The support I received for my second baby was just as valuable as the support the group gave me a year ago as a first time mom. I realized that unlike the locket that can only be filled to a maximum with specific hand picked charms, the love and support from our group cannot be capped. I am so excited and blessed to go through my journey through motherhood with the support from my favorite moms.

Me & My Big "Feb" Baby

My Newest "Bug" 

XOXO
Amanda M.
Virginia

The Lovebug in Pittsburgh

Thanks to technology, it's taken a while to get the photos from our time with the Lovebug Locket from one device to another, but here they are.

I got the envelope when I was going through a somewhat tumultuous time - trying different levels of my post-partum medication to see if I was ready to be done with them. I was not.

Chickie needed to touch it and bat it around from the moment it came out of the envelope. It had a comforting weight to it.

 



I was able to put everything on the back burner while I had the necklace. Kelsey was so enthralled with it that she couldn't keep her fingers off of it, and was constantly touching, poking, moving it around to watch it sparkle and to hear the charms dangle inside. I told her about the moms and babies it represented, and told her Isaac and Porter's story, showed her photos on Kim's blog. I told her about Q and A, and Walker, and their stays in the NICU.

As I told her about the strength my newfound friends had given me over time, whether they were aware of it or not, I felt a sense of peace come over me. I might not have friends and family close by who can just come over and help out when asked, but I do have a hundred other women who know what I'm going through, who I can turn to for help. Who I can ask stupid questions, get advice, get opinions, and have a civil debate with. Several of whom had dealt with post-partum depression and knew what it felt like and could talk me down from the panic attacks.

I hope that expecting friends of mine (and Kelsey in the future) can find a similar support group, because I know I would be in a much worse place without those who I have been lucky enough to call my friends. It doesn't matter whether or not I'll meet them all in person, we have forged a relationship centered around our children that has branched off into personal friendships. The fact that this necklace exists and is making the rounds from mother to mother is tangible evidence of this bond we all share.

A Weekend Away

The necklace came to me at a perfect time.  This weekend I had a four day weekend.  My FIL called on Tuesday asking us if we had any plans this weekend and invited us up to their camp house in Stony Creek, NY.  I had been beginning to feel in a rut and I figured this was just the break that I needed to feel a little better.

The necklace arrived on Thursday, just in time to come on my trip with me.  We left on Friday after work and Evey slept most of the way out.  We surprised MIL and SIL, they did not know we were coming.

Saturday we went to Queensbury and ate at a restaurant called the Harvest, which Rachel Raysays has the best pizza.  My FIL is an awesome cook and made many homemade meals for us.  We stopped quickly at the outlets on Sunday and I got Evey 6 long sleeve shirts and a Christmas dress for $41 at the Children's Place.  We went to Martha's for ice cream and MIL fed Evey a couple licks of pumpkin ice cream.  She loved it.

Today I have off and sent Evey to daycare.  It has been great being able to do a bunch of things for myself that I have not been able to do in so long.  I got to just sit and catch up on my TV, read the Hunger Games, and the walk to the post office to mail the necklace was nice.


The necklace and the break away from the normal routine has really helped to lift my spirits again.  I hope that the necklace  brings some happiness to everyone else.

2 Little Lovebugs

I received the necklace on Monday and it instantly brought a smile to my face. :) We were outside playing with Briella and her friends (9 year old girls) when I opened the package and I got to show them the necklace and explain to them what we were doing with it. Briella loved the necklace, Adam loved the necklace, I loved the necklace.


That evening I made Jessica Read's delicious chicken enchiladas and spilled a little bit on the necklace. Don't worry, I licked it off ;) KIDDING! Adam loved playing with it while he was nursing and while he was sitting on my lap facing me. Briella wanted to wear it and got a huge grin on her face when I put it on her (unfortunately I wasn't able to get a good picture of her wearing it).

The necklace traveled with us to Briella's gymnastics class where she twirled and whirled and kept ignoring me. AND my time with the necklace would not have been complete if I didn't make a trip to Target wearing it. So I made a special trip just for the necklace :)

All in all, my time with the necklace was not spent doing anything spectacular just doing my normal activities as a mom of two little lovebugs. I really enjoyed wearing the necklace and it brought a smile to my face on several occasions. It was nice to feel that you all were walking around with me. I hope you all enjoying your time with it and I hope it brings you a little bit of sunshine :)

Love you all,

Bethany

We got the bug baby!

We received the love bug when Harper caught the bug at daycare! Don't worry we will lysol wipe it before sending it off ;) When I went to check the mail on Tuesday after getting Harper from day care, I was excited to see the little package. Inside was a notebook and a cute locket case..I couldn't help but think about the movie; Sisterhood of the traveling pants.

Since I have had the locket, I have been at home trying to entertain my fiesty 7mth old who does not feel well. I have slowly been pulling my hair out..checking the feb mama board, pinning like crazy & chugging coffee. I was lucky enough to be able to take off the rest of the week to stay at home with her, so hopefully she feels better!

Although the locket hasn't cured my sick baby or has done anything magical, I am blessed to have a group who I can rely on for questions, tips, uplifting thoughts & prayers but most of all..someone to be there in the middle of the night when no one else is. I don't get involved too much with personal posts, elfster etc but don't think I don't care! When I read about the love bug locket, I couldn't wait to carry you ladies around with me (even if it was around the house). You all have made my pregnancy and start at motherhood so much easier and I couldn't be more grateful. Hopefully the locket will come back to me again and I can bring it through a day in the life of a Coastie :) Until then, I am sending it off tomorrow to continue its journey to all of you! Bethany Morris be on the lookout ;)

There's Strength in the Simple...

I arrived home last night to an empty house. While it's always a bit sad at first, when I walk by our wall of pictures, I'm reminded of how "full" our house is-- even when my husband is away. And away he is. He will be gone every Tuesday-Friday for the next 14 weeks. It's just Avery and I, and this year, a new house full of boxes. And if I even for a moment begin to feel sorry for myself (which I inevitably begin to at times-- I'm only human and I'm REALLY tired these days), I think of all the strong women who are single mothers or who have husbands that are gone for months serving our country. Tuesday through Friday doesn't seem so bad.

I also arrived home last night to a surprise in my mailbox. Our mail has been a bit sparse lately while the post office continues to process our forwarding request. So when I saw the padded envelope from Kari, I was thrilled! Av and I went inside and we immediately opened it up.

She asked nicely, so I let her try it on...

And in that moment, I was struck by how amazing it was that this special necklace was about to embark upon such a unique journey. Strong women, who I have come to know and respect, would be opening that same package (well, maybe not the same, as I tore it from top to bottom in my eagerness to see the contents) and would be sharing bits of themselves as they wore it for just a couple days. And it reminded me of the special pieces of jewelry the women in my family have passed down through the years and the journeys those items have made.

When my grandmother (a widower and eternal optimist) first learned she had cancer, my mom and I bought her this cross necklace:

She wore through all of her chemo treatments and each doctor's appointment, including the one where they told her there was nothing else they could do. I wore it to her funeral, and it continues to be one of my most meaningful possessions.

When I went through my divorce, I was so emotionally (and physically) drained that I didn't know how I was going to re-start my life. At 29, I had walked away (for good reason) from seven years of people, places and memories. My mom (a wicked strong single mother) was on the first plane to Connecticut to hold my hand and support me through it. And she did it without saying "I told you so" about my choice of Husband #1.

One month later when I called her to tell her that just days after my kamikaze exit, I met this amazing new man and I thought sure he was "the one," she shared in my excitement, although was probably understandably weary of such a quick turnaround. Six months later when she visited and saw how happy I was, she took this off her finger and offered it to Ben (for when he was ready):

What was extra special is that my grandmother had also worn it. And, since this was NEVER offered to Husband #1, I knew my mom saw the strength in what Ben and I had found.

My jewelry box has many more little trinkets that make a quirky metal quilt of special moments in my life. The pin my brother bought me with his first bit of allowance. The earrings from my first boyfriend who said we'd never break up (which we did...the next week). My sorority letters on their delicate chain. Most, if not all, have no monetary value, but are the winning lottery ticket when it comes to sentimental value.

I know this necklace won't find a permanent home in my jewelry box, but having it for just a moment will be a story I share with Avery when I teach hew about the power of women. We've laughed. We've fought. We've supported each other at 3 am (and 4am, and 5am....). In a year, we've had divorces and experienced family deaths, we've grown both closer and respectfully apart, and still we find new ways to make each other smile. Honestly, it could be a piece of string with a bottle cap tied to it, and it would still be an honor to wear it.

It's only day one of its visit, and while nothing out of the ordinary has happened, it has certainly reminded me of my extraordinary blessings.

I hope, at the least, it does that for you too.